Couch potato on a lazy-boy

Back again!!!

2011-07-08T00:05:00.000-07:00

Feel like a virgin coming back to blogging after almost two months. . Only if you could go back to being a virgin in real life every two months. Can't help but remember Madonna's song, like a virgin, touched for a very first time.

Now it feels normal. Back to random ramblings.

man vs woman

2011-05-17T00:50:00.000-07:00

If a man finds that his partner is cheating and discovers that she is cheating with another woman, he gets delighted!! menage a trois, here I come!!!!!!

If a woman finds the same she gets hurt and offended.

Strange!!!

Conspiracy theories

2011-05-04T04:35:00.000-07:00

How can I stay away from writing mine. How many such opportunities does one get in a lifetime.

So here goes mine:

1. What if Osama was long dead. US just decides to carry out this operation, kill some random Afghani and then proclaim that he was killed by US.
2. What if Osama died a natural death. Pakistan must have given him shelter so knew when he died. They then contacted US to tell them that they can pay some money in aids and claim Osama's killing. He any way carried a $50 million prize money. For Obama it was a god send opportunity to improve his rating and chances for another shot at presidency.
3. What if he really was killed by US. India can carry out a similar operation for Mr. Ibrahim.
What do you think really happened? What if he never died and just left the building :-)

Life ~ Condom

2011-04-28T02:45:00.001-07:00

Life is like a condom. If you don't use it expires. If you misuse, it can cause complications.

Bilateral Talks

2011-04-05T02:02:00.000-07:00

Contributed by Anish Shah

Thought

2011-02-11T07:02:00.000-08:00

Is love without sex better than sex without love?

Use of tongue

2011-02-07T22:26:00.000-08:00

There is a reason why tongue doesn't have any bones in it. So that you don't pick up a bone with anyone using harsh words. Tongue is flexible as it is all muscle and imparts a valuable lesson to be flexible while communicating. Tongue is pink in color and loses its color when ill, shows that your talk should always result a pink blush on other person.
Tongue stays inside the mouth teaching that all negative and hurtful words should stay inside and not be spoken aloud.
So many things to learn from the tongue.

2011-02-07T02:05:00.001-08:00

A woman's mind is cleaner than a man's. She changes it more often.

Egypt

2011-02-07T01:48:00.000-08:00

Do you think Egypt will go from one fundamentalist ruler to another, under the guise of democracy and secularism? What will be the point of so many lives lost if true democracy does not come to the state? Guess these questions are quite rhetorical considering the long bloody history the country has and so is the adage - history repeats itself.

New Year Resolutions

2011-01-04T22:50:00.000-08:00

Try to stay happy
Stay away from complications
Take less stress and if required to take then take only the right stress for right priorities
React less and get less angry
Focus on kids
Learn something new - maybe swimming or guitar
Start gymming or walking
Read more and watch less TV
Connect with family and friends
Stay happy

2010-12-27T01:28:00.001-08:00

The shortest day of your life is not during winter solstice..but is the day when you died....

Long work week

2010-11-08T00:56:00.000-08:00

We are not the only ones who hate a long work week. Even the calendar after Monday and Tuesday says "W Th F" (WTF!)

OBAMA Visit

2010-11-07T21:26:00.000-08:00

Obama acknowledges US dominance is on the decline and also admits that India is a crucial factor in overall world growth. He also pleaded the Indian businesses to create jobs and successfully managed to sign for creating 700,000 jobs in the US. Rewind to 1990s-2000 era when Indian businessmen used to do the same and negotiated with US companies to create jobs in India. Life has come a full circle and this trend of India creating jobs overseas will only increase. I hope Indians will now realize that they are not just a cost arbitrage market but provide immense value to other countries. Hope this will also increase and improve confidence of Indians in their own capabilities, skills and expertise.
Did any one ever think in 2000 that India will help create jobs in US. Now that is the power of the Indian market and Indians overall.

Vote for him, please

2010-10-21T23:42:00.001-07:00

Also request you to spread the message and the link.

http://www.ndtv.com/article/catch%20of%20the%20day/catch-he-brings-hot-meals-to-india-s-homeless-61029

Common Wealth Minister

2010-09-30T06:35:00.001-07:00

Mr Suresh Kalmadi has truly taken the definition of CWG and worked towards making the first two words come true for self. He decided the words common wealth are literal in nature and the money provided by the tax payers through the government are his to use. Well, it is common wealth.

However, he is still poor and CW has not given him any up-liftment by helping him to cross the poverty line. So he has decided to bid for hosting Olympics in 2015 so that he can further prosper. What an enterprising young man, embodying India's entrepreneurial spirit. Hats off Mr Minister.

Hope IIMs, Harvard and Insead are looking and will incorporate him as a case study for their entrepreneurial workshops.

2010-09-28T23:26:00.000-07:00

A boy can wreck a house but a girl can wreck a mind.

Social service tip

2010-09-16T03:35:00.001-07:00

Drink all the alcohol in the world so that others don't drink and get addicted.

Wisdom Pearls

2010-09-05T21:59:00.000-07:00

Money can't buy happiness, but somehow it is more comfortable to cry in a BMW than on a bicycle.
Alcohol doesn't solve any problems but neither does milk

Right/Wrong

2010-08-29T21:42:00.000-07:00

Why does something so wrong (according to the world) sometime feels so right (according to self)?

2010-08-05T00:24:00.000-07:00

You can only analyse the past, but you have to design the future.

- Edward De Bono

Let it be

2010-07-23T00:20:00.000-07:00

Once Buddha along with his disciples happened to pass a lake. They stopped
there and Buddha told one of his disciples, "I am thirsty. Do get me some water from that lake there."The disciple walked up to the lake. When he reached it, he noticed bullock cart crossing through the lake. As a result, the water became very muddy,very turbid. The disciple thought, "How can I give this muddy water to Buddha to drink!"
So he came back and told Buddha, "The water in there is very muddy. I don't think it is fit to drink."After about half an hour, again Buddha asked the same disciple to go back to the lake and get him some water to drink. The disciple obediently went back to the lake and found the mud was settled a bit but still not fit for drinking. He returned and informed Buddha about the same.
After sometime, again Buddha asked the same disciple to go back.The disciple reached the lake to find the lake absolutely clean and clear with pure water in it. The mud had settled down and the water above it was crystal clear. So he collected some water in a pot and brought it to Buddha.Buddha looked at the water, and then he looked up at the disciple and said," See what you did to make the water clean...You just let it be....
and the mud settled down on its own - and you got clear water.Buddha continued "Your mind is also like that! When it is disturbed.....just let it be...... Give it a little time. It will settle down on its own.You don't have to put in any effort to calm it down......... It will happen. "It is effortless."

WAKA WAKA - SPAIN

2010-07-11T20:50:00.000-07:00

Brain - It's a good thing that Spain won. I was rooting for them to win though I am not a football fan. Why, because now that Spaniards have something to cheer about. This victory will lead to people drinking, eating, shopping, gifting etc thereby providing some contribution to the economy. Hopefully this will help lift the depression and maybe stop the recession. So, good that Spain won.

Heart - Some people can't leave sports as sports, can they?

2010-06-26T01:27:00.001-07:00

jeene ke liye socha hi nahi, dard sambhalane honge

Tshirt saying

2010-06-22T22:54:00.000-07:00

Virginity is not dignity, just a lack of opportunity.

Switch off from Tech

2010-06-11T03:28:00.001-07:00

Is anyone up for the below challenge:
Switch off from technology for a week from June 14th until June 19th. During this period no emails (other than work related), no facebook, no twitter, no Orkut or any of the other social networking sites, no internet browsing unless your work requires you to. Now spend that time
1. Reading books, magazines or whatever you wanted to do such as photography, painting, music etc
2. Phone your friends / family and talk to them, meet up with them, go for coffee etc. Make the real connection and not use facebook like medium
I bet you think you'd not survive without technology for a week and I say you will not only survive, but also discover new joys in life.

Are you dear reader, up for the challenge?????

Tell me your experiences here.

Road quote

2010-05-28T21:41:00.001-07:00

Road is a great equalizer - Manoj Jain

Tip for US visa interview

2010-05-19T01:09:00.000-07:00

Heard this tip from a fellow colleague who traveled to US a few years ago.

If you mention that you are visiting a family member who has dogs, most consulate folks get very friendly and bond over pets. So make sure that you remember a dog, breed, habits etc and have a cute name for the pup so that you can bond over the animal and get your visa application accepted.

I have not tried it. This is a third party account.

Happy applying.

Secret of "Living"

2010-05-10T23:23:00.000-07:00

Two ways of living your life:

By crying that it is over or
By smiling that it happened

How do you want to live?

Secret to live longer - for Men

2010-04-26T20:48:00.000-07:00

We men have known all along but here is the scientific proof.

Post from Rediff.com

Stare at women's breasts for 10 minutes a day and increase your life span by five years, that's the conclusion of a new study. Men who stare at women’s breasts for 10 minutes a day live five years longer. The study claims that 10 minutes of ogling is equivalent to a 30-minute gym workout. The men who stare at women’s breasts have lower blood pressure, suffer less cardiovascular disease and have slower heart beat.

Text: ANI. Photo: Getty Images

Question - does it hold good for Gay men too?

2010-04-20T18:17:00.001-07:00

2010-04-09T00:03:00.000-07:00

Movie titles apt for the cast below
Sania Mirza - Sleeping with the enemy
Shoaib Malik - Gharwali, Baharwali
Ayesha Siddiqui - Malamaal Weekly

Tech marvel

2010-03-27T19:54:00.000-07:00

Squeezo kissan sauce bottle. Simple solution for a complicated problem.

New book title

2010-03-25T23:50:00.000-07:00

How does this sound - "memoirs of a workaholic who'd rather be an alcoholic"

Mayawati - 5 crore garland

2010-03-16T03:24:00.000-07:00

I would like to pay homage to the humility of Mayawati who very "generously" consented to be adorned by a garland made of 50,000 currency notes of 1,000 rupees totaling to a paltry sum of 5 crores. After all that she has done for the state of UP and their poor people, this is what she gets. An uproar regarding the garlands worth. Now insensitive. I urge Indians to read the accomplishments, for "betterment" of the people of UP, below and give her the credit due to her, and totally deserved.

Erecting statues worth 2000 crores. Beautification of the state making it pleasing to the eye. What a noble deed.
Eminent domain - usurping land from 9,000 farmers is a feat par excellence for someone with such humble background
Launching welfare schemes worth 7,000 crores all on self welfare. After all, charity begins at home and god helps those who help themselves. What a showcase of character and leadership trait. Leading by example.
Last but not the least, embarking on selling the truly priceless Taj and planning to reate a shopping corridor behind the heritage monument. What a vision.

And people create a furore over a meagre 5 crores. Hmmmpfffff........

Womens bill

2010-03-10T22:14:00.000-08:00

Men are intimidated by powerful women. It has been re-confirmed by the Indian parliament. You'd think that most men and all men in the lok/rajya sabha's who think that it is a man's world will not be spooked to pass a reservation bill but the story was completely different. The brouhaha surrounding the passing of the bill and the amazing walk outs by so many only reinforces the belief. Men are intimidated by powerful women. Only Sonia Gandhi was able to restrain her congressmen and ensure that they passed the bill irrespective of what they feel. Again, Men are intimidated by powerful women. You get the drift......

Happy Holi

2010-02-28T20:54:00.000-08:00

Color me green

Color me red

Color me blue

Color me true

Let's get together and say one boli

Happy holi, happy holi

Gloat

2010-02-22T01:46:00.000-08:00

Thought since this is my blog space, will gloat about the prediction I made in my previous blog that the movie might really be terrible. Take a bow!!!!!
Maybe this should be my profession; reviewing movies.

Autistic Genius

2010-02-12T00:50:00.000-08:00

Make way Prahlad Kakkar, Prasoon Joshi and Piyush Pandey, for a new marketing genius in town. His name is Khan.

No one in their wildest dreams could have come up with a marketing campaign to promote a film and pique interest in the movie even before the release. Right from getting frisked in US for being a muslim to the spat with Sena, he has either orchestrated it all or it is sheer coincidence and the stars are shining bright for his film to make these coincidences occur. The nation is sympathetic to him, angry with Sena and extremely curious to watch the film. Now maybe the film is really bad but by the time every one figures that out it would have made a killing at the box office. Sheer Genius!!!

Take a bow Philip Kotler and please include him in your next edition of your marketing bible.

He plays an autistic/asperger affected person in the film. Who is autistic I wonder.

Blogging

2010-02-08T20:22:00.000-08:00

Why blogging is not sustainable over long term?
Because it is like going to the Gym. The novely wears off after a while. Unless you are a celebrity with a huge fan following and an OCD to write daily, mostly OCD, you will stop blogging after a while. Other things will take priority over writing for all part time writers. Many will attribute the lack to a writer's block but in reality it is the boredom which sets in after a while. Similar to going to a gym. The initial novelty and the adrenaline to see a well toned sculpted body which garners appreciative glances from people slowly starts wearing off as the sessions get tedious, the glances go down and the monotony sets in. Unless you are a celebrity who is required to look good as a part of the job or you are addicted to the adrenaline rush after a gym session, the frequency will reduce and ultimately stop. Same with blogging.
Show me a blogger who writes daily and I will show you hundreds who don't.

Eclipse

2010-01-15T05:02:00.000-08:00

The world saw the longest Annular solar eclipse and won't see it for another 1,000 years. The moon covers sun incompletely making sun look like a ring and thereby plunging the world in a semi darkness state for a brief period. The semi darkness state lasted for 10 mins. Devout people did not eat, prayed like crazy and generally did everything to ward off evil spirits who come out during the eclipse. The eclipse lasted only 10 minutes and the sun came out in full glory but the people of this world are still living in the dark thinking a solar eclipse to be an evil event and dangerous to health contrary to the reality which is quite simple. Wish with the next eclipse the shadow of darkness over these devoted people minds is also lifted and they see such phenomenon as scientific rather than religious.
Time to come out of the shadows of superstitions. Time for the eclipse to lift.

Foolish

2010-01-12T22:23:00.000-08:00

If you don't act foolish when you are young, you won't have anything to smile about when you are old.
Do something you think you might end up regretting in future. What do you achieve? Experience and lots of fun while doing it.
Once in a while, do something risque'. You might get surprised by the outcome.

In the near future

2010-01-08T04:05:00.000-08:00

http://www.flyyoufools.com/page/3

I'm back

2010-01-07T20:53:00.001-08:00

I am hungry, to write more and it's a new year. So promise to write more often than the last few months. Promise to take up issues as innane as possible. Promise to write more random abstract stuff than imaginable and try to make sense out them. But most importantly, promise to write more.
All you faithful readers, wish you a very happy 2010. The world acording to Mayans is going to end in 2012 so my suggestion is to live it up. Throw caution to winds, make every day count, forget the past and make sure that each day u do something crazy to make the next three years fruitful, fun and happy.
And if 2012 turns out like Y2K, a damp squib, then count your blessings and enjoy your life that much more.
Revel in 2010, relish the joys and pleasures of life, drink in the moments and have a blast.

Another chance

2009-12-07T03:41:00.000-08:00

Give me another chance, I wanna grow up once again - 3 Idiots

Wants

2009-11-30T22:29:00.001-08:00

If you got everything you wanted/dreamt, then you'd have nothing to wish for and wouldnt' that be terrible, to live a life with no wishes or dreams.

26/11 - first anniversary

2009-11-26T23:01:00.000-08:00

It came
We screamed/protested/did candle marches/wrote volumes in papers and magazines for a day/had a debate on TV (only to increase the TRPs)
It passed
Nothing much happened
Not many care other than the ones who were affected
Typical story of India's reaction to terrorism
Typical story of Indian govt's apathy towards Indians

Daru

2009-11-15T21:15:00.000-08:00

Ek bahut bade sharaabi ki car ke peeche likha tha:

Daru peeo, insaan bano. Roti to kutte bhi khaate hain.

Born to win

2009-10-30T02:47:00.000-07:00

Born to win is a concept which talks about how human beings are born to win. They start early, at the conception stage. Only one out of the supposedly 20 million fertilize and becomes a person. So you win amongst 20 million to be what you are. The theory says that you are constantly playing a game and always winning. Winning is immaterial as you will win no matter what. The important aspect is which game are you playing? Once you recognize that you will start playing games which you really should be and remember, winning is a given. Now, that is confusing enough, let's look at one example to make things simpler.

If you are running a race and you come second, then the game you are playing is the "reasons" why I didn't come first game and you are winning the game with your reasoning ability. You will have a million reasons, like wind factor, slow start etc etc and you will win this game as you have successfully come up with reasons.

Same holds good for anything you do. If you recognize the game you are playing, you will become a successful person as you will now choose the right games to play. Remember, winning is a given.

Quote of the day

2009-10-28T23:19:00.000-07:00

When I was young I used to think that money was the most important thing in life. Now that I am old, I know it is - Oscar Wilde

Bride dumps groom during wedding

2009-10-28T00:58:00.000-07:00

Read this news on Indiatimes.com.

AMBALA: The new-age Indian woman has arrived. A bride from Ambala Cantt on Monday walked out on her groom the moment she set eyes on him after the

jai mala (garlanding) ceremony, as if, in instant realisation that he wasn’t the man of her dreams. No amount of ranting and raving by the boy and his family or police intervention could bring about a change of heart. “We tried a lot to persuade Reena but she just wouldn’t listen. She said she didn’t want to marry Dharamvir Singh because she didn’t like him. There was no way we could have forced our will on her,” said the bride’s father, Ramkishan.

The link to the news item is below:

http://timesofindia.indiatimes.com/city/chandigarh/Bride-dumps-groom-during-wedding/articleshow/5170718.cms

Now what could be the reason for her dumping the boy after the garlanding ceremony. Perhaps "Guitar ya Violin nahi baje"
Go women power.......

Wacky happenings around the world

2009-10-18T21:43:00.000-07:00

Check the link.

http://www.indiatimes.com/photostory/5136913.cms

Love the first one. Move over silicone, here comes the Knight.
Now this is what you call a knight in shining armor or a white knight to the rescue.
Alternatively, he can hypnotise men to believe they are bigger.

Do your bit and make it large

2009-10-18T21:03:00.001-07:00

The link to the blog is below which lists the things which are simple enough and can be done by individuals and do not require advance degree in Physics.
http://busyriting.com/?p=366

Thanks Malini Chechi for the post. I am doing my bit by putting your link and saving on some space thereby reducing emissions.
Readers - do your bit and make it large.

The Black Swan Event

2009-10-14T07:06:00.001-07:00

I believe that the current recession is a black swan event. The theory propagated by Taleb states that black swan events are events which happen once in a lifetime and have an impact which is forever. I believe that this recession is exactly that. This not only has brought more focus on the importance of having adequate risk measures in place, but also integrated and united the world on having regulations to prevent a few people taking advantage of the system at the cost of the larger population. The bright side is that the growth pace will be faster now that the recession is bottoming out but the growth will be in a regulated framework so chances of things slipping out will reduce. The next phase of growth has begun and any one who is interested in making it big should make their move now as the world is at an inflection point ready to prance into the growth trajectory.

Austerity Drive

2009-09-17T05:45:00.001-07:00

Cong has embarked on Austerity drive asking their MPs to travel economy class. Great thought. Shows our leaders do have a heart inside their corrupt bodies. We as Indians salute the leadership of Sonia and her team for becoming this sensitive. However, no thank you. Please continue travelling business. Otherwise, your ministers will only cause inconvenience to fellow economy passengers. With their body guards, entourage and high and mighty attitude and behavior, the simple economy class passenger will be put to a lot of trouble. So, a humble request, please travel business. We don't mind paying for it, just like all other expenses we bear for you.

Some where I can imagine someone hitting my head with Hindustan Times paper asking me to stop being this cynical.

Words of wisdom

2009-09-16T21:59:00.000-07:00

Written by Regina Brett, 90 years old, of The Plain Dealer, Cleveland, Ohio:
"To celebrate growing older, I once wrote the 45 lessons life taught me. It is the most-requested column I've ever written. My odometer rolled over to 90 in August, so here is the column once more:
1. Life isn't fair, but it's still good.
2. When in doubt, just take the next small step.
3. Life is too short to waste time hating anyone
4. Your job won't take care of you when you are sick. Your friends and parents will. Stay in touch.
5. Pay off your credit cards every month.
6. You don't have to win every argument. Agree to disagree.
7. Cry with someone. It's more healing than crying alone.
8. It's OK to get angry with God. He can take it.
9. Save for retirement starting with your first pay cheque.
10. When it comes to chocolate, resistance is futile.
11. Make peace with your past so it won't screw up the present.
12. It's OK to let your children see you cry.
13. Don't compare your life to others. You have no idea what their journey is all about.
14. If a relationship has to be a secret, you shouldn't be in it.
15. Everything can change in the blink of an eye. But don't worry; God never blinks.
16. Take a deep breath. It calms the mind.
17. Get rid of anything that isn't useful, beautiful or joyful.
18. Whatever doesn't kill you really does make you stronger.
19. It's never too late to have a happy childhood. But the second one is up to you and no one else. 20. When it comes to going after what you love in life, don't take no for an answer.
21. Burn the candles, use the nice sheets, wear the fancy lingerie. Don't save it for a special occasion. Today is special.
22. Over-prepare, then go with the flow.
23. Be eccentric now. Don't wait for old age to wear purple.
24. The most important sex organ is the brain.
25. No one is in charge of your happiness but you.
26. Frame every so-called disaster with these words 'In five years, will this matter?'
27. Always choose life. 28. Forgive everyone everything.
29. What other people think of you is none of your business.
30. Time heals almost everything. Give time time.
31. However good or bad a situation is, it will change.
32. Don't take yourself so seriously. No one else does.
33. Believe in miracles.
34. God loves you because of who God is, not because of anything you did or didn't do.
35. Don't audit life. Show up and make the most of it now.
36. Growing old beats the alternative -- dying young.
37. Your children get only one childhood.
38. All that truly matters in the end is that you loved.
39. Get outside every day. Miracles are waiting everywhere.
40. If we all threw our problems in a pile and saw everyone else's,we'd grab ours back.
41. Envy is a waste of time. You already have all you need.
42. The best is yet to come.
43. No matter how you feel, get up, dress up and show up.
44. Yield.
45. Life isn't tied with a bow, but it's still a gift."

2009-09-14T23:30:00.000-07:00

Do something worth writing or write something worth reading.

Friends

2009-09-10T23:17:00.001-07:00

Friends do not not need words from you to understand. They will understand your silence as well.

Husbands

2009-09-08T20:08:00.000-07:00

There are many things which can go wrong in everyday routine life. It's very important for wives to have husbands in their lives. You cannot blame everything on the government.

And then the fight started.........

How the fight started?

2009-08-27T08:08:00.000-07:00

My wife sat down on the couch next to me as I was flipping channels. She asked, 'What's on TV?' I said, 'Dust.' And then the fight started...
+++++
My wife was hinting about what she wanted for our upcoming anniversary. She said, 'I want something shiny that goes from 0 to 150 in about 3 seconds.' I bought her a weighing scale. And then the fight started...
+++++
When I got home last night, my wife demanded that I take her someplace expensive... so, I took her to a gas station. And then the fight started...
+++++
After retiring, I went to the Social Security office to apply for Social Security. The woman behind the counter asked me for my driver's license to verify my age. I looked in my pockets and realized I had left my wallet at home. I told the woman that I was very sorry, but I would have to go home and come back later. The woman said, 'Unbutton your shirt'. So I opened my shirt revealing my curly silver hair. She said, 'That silver hair on your chest is proof enough for me' and she processed my Social Security application. When I got home, I excitedly told my wife about my experience at the Social Security office. She said, 'You should have dropped your pants. You might have gotten disability, too.' And then the fight started...
+++++
My wife and I were sitting at a table at my high school reunion, and I kept staring at a drunken lady swigging her drink as she sat alone at a nearby table. My wife asked, 'Do you know her?' 'Yes,' I sighed, 'She's my old girlfriend. I understand she took to drinking right after we split up those many years ago, and I hear she hasn't been sober since.' 'My God!' says my wife, 'who would think a person could go on celebrating that long?' And then the fight started...
+++++
I took my wife to a restaurant. The waiter, for some reason, took my order first. "I'll have the strip steak, medium rare, please." He said, "Aren't you worried about the mad cow?" "Naaah, she can order for herself." And then the fight started...
+++++
A woman is standing nude, looking in the bedroom mirror. She is not happy with what she sees and says to her husband, 'I feel horrible; I look old, fat and ugly. I really need you to pay me a compliment.' The husband replies, 'Your eyesight's damn near perfect.' And then the fight started.....
+++++
I tried to talk my wife into buying a case of Miller Light for $14.95. Instead, she bought a jar of cold cream for $7.95. I told her the beer would make her look better at night than the cold cream. And then the fight started....
+++++
My wife asked me if a certain dress made her butt look big. I told her not as much as the dress she wore yesterday. and then the fight started....
+++++
A man and a woman were asleep like two innocent babies. Suddenly, at 3 o'clock in the morning, a loud noise came from outside. The woman, bewildered, jumped up from the bed and yelled at the man 'Holy crap. That must be my husband!' So the man jumped out of the bed; scared and naked jumped out the window. He smashed himself on the ground, ran through a thorn bush and to his car as fast as he could go. A few minutes later he returned and went up to the bedroom and screamed at the woman, 'I AM your husband!' The woman yelled back, 'Yeah, then why were you running?' And then the fight started.....
+++++
Saturday morning I got up early, quietly dressed, made my lunch, grabbed the dog, and slipped quietly into the garage. I hooked up the boat up to the truck, and proceeded to back out into a torrential downpour. The wind was blowing 50 mph, so I pulled back into the garage, turned on the radio, and discovered that the weather would be bad all day. I went back into the house, quietly undressed, and slipped back into bed. I cuddled up to my wife's back, now with a different anticipation, and whispered, 'The weather out there is terrible.' My loving wife of 10 years replied, 'Can you believe my stupid husband is out fishing in that?' And then the fight started ...
+++++
I asked my wife, "Where do you want to go for our anniversary? " It warmed my heart to see her face melt in sweet appreciation. "Somewhere I haven't been in a long time!" she said. So I suggested, "How about the kitchen?" And that's when the fight started....
+++++
My wife and I are watching Who Wants To Be A Millionaire while we were in bed. I turned to her and said, "Do you want to have sex?" "No," she answered. I then said, "Is that your final answer?" She didn't even look at me this time, simply saying "Yes." So I said, "Then I'd like to phone a friend." And that's when the fight started....
+++++
When our lawn mower broke and wouldn't run, my wife kept hinting to me that I should get it fixed. But, somehow I always had something else to take care of first: the truck, the car, e-mail, fishing, always something more important to me. Finally she thought of a clever way to make her point. When I arrived home one day, I found her seated in the tall grass, busily snipping away with a tiny pair of sewing scissors. I watched silently for a short time and then went into the house. I was gone only a few minutes. When I came out again I handed her a toothbrush. 'When you finish cutting the grass,' I said, 'you might as well sweep the driveway.' and then the fight started...

A wake up call to all workaholics

2009-08-20T04:26:00.000-07:00

Decoding the ban on Savita Bhabhi

2009-07-23T06:39:00.000-07:00

Q: Why did the govt. ban Savita Bhabhi?
A: Because the old geezers sitting in the parliament started getting desperate and frustrated seeing the porn comic. All of their fantasies were coming true but in a comic book format and not in real life and their yearning for such a person started becoming stronger by the day. How long can one keep those emotions repressed. So they decided to ban the site to save themselves from the torture of seeing their dreams and fantasies being made into a site without featuring them.

Who can act in Savita Bhabhi?

2009-07-23T06:28:00.000-07:00

A lot has been written about Savita Bhabhi and how the government by imposing a ban on this site has imposed a ban on freedom and liberty of women. Pritish Nandy went as asking women to stage a dharna to boycott this ban as Savita Bhabhi represented their liberty, their right to free living etc. Bollocks. Savita Bhabhi was purely a porn magazine which was a product of a guy's vivid imagination and fantasies. He was just putting a sketch to his fantasies and a lot of guys around the world were getting pleasure seeing those as many must have had these too.
However, since the government has already imposed a ban, this topic has become a rage among bollywood producers especially the b-grade movie ones. So if they were to cast someone for this role who do you think would best suit? My picks are below in preferential order.

Sherlyn Chopra - She looks the part as she probably lives it too in real life.
Sophie Choudhary - She is the nice curvaceous punju woman who can fit quite easily, though she finds it difficult to fit into her clothes.
Tanushree Dutta - Great body and a complete monopoly on come hither look makes her a good candidate.
Sushmita Sen - She is very sensuous and can carry the docile and sensuality with ease. Remember Main Hoon Na.
Riya Sen - she can't act but guess the role might not require much acting.

Any one you can think of?

2009-07-20T03:19:00.001-07:00

If you make people think they're thinking, they'll love you;

but if you really make them think they'll hate you.

Attitude

2009-07-20T03:18:00.000-07:00

“The longer I live, the more I realize the impact of attitude on life. Attitude, to me, is more important than facts. It is more important than the past, the education, the money, than circumstances, than failure, than successes, than what other people think or say or do. It is more important than appearance, giftedness or skill. It will make or break a company... a church... a home. The remarkable thing is we have a choice everyday regarding the attitude we will embrace for that day. We cannot change our past... we cannot change the fact that people will act in a certain way. We cannot change the inevitable. The only thing we can do is play on the one string we have, and that is our attitude. I am convinced that life is 10% what happens to me and 90% of how I react to it. And so it is with you... we are in charge of our Attitudes.” - Charles R. Swindoll

Harry Potter 6

2009-07-16T07:39:00.000-07:00

Don't judge a book by it's movie goes the popular saying. That is true for all Harry Potter movies except the first one. The first one brought those characters from the book alive and made it real for us. However, subsequent movies have not been able to do justice to the books. But in all fairness, movies are a shorter medium compared to books and therefore asking a movie to do full justice is asking a little too much. The post is not about gyan but by now you would have guessed that keeping me from giving gyan is like trying to take a candy out of a child's hand. Quite a daunting task.
Harry Potter's new visual instalment is indeed a visual treat. The director has redeemed himself from the debacle of the earlier movie and has made some spectacular strides in terms of story telling, visual effects and cinematography. The most striking feature of the movie is the beautiful and at times mushy build up of friendship and romance between the central characters. But the movie is all about how the friendship has evolved in 6 years, the chemistry between three best friends and this is one aspect which will appeal to most segment of the masses. Older fans will relive the friendship they shared during their youth, youngsters will look at each other and think we are like this and overall everyone will have this great feeling about friendship. This is where the hidden message comes through. If you have your friends around, you will tide over dark times.
Long live friendship.

Verdict on the movie - go watch it NOW

Dangerous Discovery

2009-07-16T02:51:00.000-07:00

Do you know the most dangerous of all discoveries? It's not Dynamite, Atom Bomb or Biological Weapons. The most dangerous concept discovered is "Reading between the lines". I tried Wiki, Google and even the newly launched beta version of Bing to find out who came up with this "men destroying concept" and found nothing. So I am going to go out on a limb here and say it was discovered by a woman. A rather modest woman (sounds alien, right) but since she did not leave her name as the discoverer I think she was the exception in the modesty department.

Men don't read between the lines. Hell, most times they don't even read the lines. But women, they read the lines all right and then they proceed to read between the lines , whatever that means, and sometimes flip the pages to see what else is written. They analyse things by reading the lines and then over analyse by reading between the lines and then since they have a convoluted logic all hell breaks loose. Sample this example:
Guy - honey, you are looking pretty.
Girl (reading the line) - Really. I know.
And now Girl (reading between the line) - Am i really looking pretty or is he just pulling my leg. Am I looking fat? Is the dress OK? Did he see something which he is not telling me? Is he seeing someone else and just saying this to keep me happy.
You see what I mean when I say the most dangerous discovery is reading between the lines.
Guys - don't even bother to read. We are good at that.
Girls - the reason i wrote this long post is so that you have enough to read between the lines.

Women on crusades

2009-07-15T00:35:00.000-07:00

Hvae you ever noticed that woman never go for nice guys. Like the Surinder Sahani's of the world. They like their alter ego, the smart alec who has too many opinions, who thinks too much of himself and who will pamper you but will also let you know that he is a god gift to her. However, once they marry that smart alec, all women want the alec to turn into Surinder Sahani, the nice, docile, quiet, I will do anything you want and you are the apple of my eye kind of a person. I don't agree with nice guys finishing last. It's an oxymoron or someone who said was definitely a moron. All women want the arrogant prick to turn into a nice guy after marriage. I believe women are on a crusade. The kind of crusade only women can embark on and which no one understands. Well, with women, no one can really understand them and I am digressing. They want the world to turn into a nicer place and for that they all are willing to fall for the bad guy so that they can change him into a nice person eventually making the world a nicer place.
And like a man and only a man could say this, they have it all wrong. Simple solution to making the world a nice place is go only for the nice guys. Once all bad guys realize they are not getting women, they will either turn nice guys or turn to nice guys.

2009-07-15T00:34:00.000-07:00

Q: What is common between an angry woman and monsoon

A: When it rains, it pours.

2009-07-14T00:30:00.000-07:00

Q: What is common between weather and women?

A: Unpredictability.

2009-07-10T03:21:00.001-07:00

There are so many things that are incredible about me. The most amazing is my humility - Will Smith.

2009-07-09T04:12:00.000-07:00

Money cannot buy love but improves the bargaining position.

Priorities

2009-07-08T01:49:00.000-07:00

Earlier - you'd call friends and say let's meet and plan something.
Now - you'd call and say let's plan and then meet someday.
Friends are same, guess priorities have changed.

Kambakkht Ishq - update

2009-07-08T01:12:00.000-07:00

I was talking to a friend of mine who lives in Kolkata and is totally clued into Tamil movies. He told me that Kambakkht Ishq is a remake of Tamil film Pammal K Sambandam (PMK) featuring Kamal Hassan. I haven't seen PMK so cannot tell you dear readers whether it is a better movie. And, you already know my take on the Hindi remake. I wasn't aware of the remake thing and when i read the director's and producer's interview claiming that this was an original idea scripted just for Akki I believed it as it sounded quite believable. But like all "originals" in Hindi movies this one is also an "original" fake..oops..remake. Only wish that they had learnt from the makers of Ghajini the art of remaking a movie and making it watch worthy.

The Piracy Code

2009-07-06T05:22:00.000-07:00

I have finally managed to break the Piracy Code (couldn't resist the cheap imitation of the DaVinci Code). Meaning, why people go for pirated DVDs instead of watching the movie in a theatre or wait the official DVD release. Piracy thrives due to movies like Chandni Chowk and Kambakkth Ishq. Who would want to spend 500 bucks for a movie which is absolutely trash?

Same thing goes for music CD. Why spend for a movie CD when only one song is good in the entire album. It is better to download it from the net or go for an assortment of good songs in one CD.

Kambakkht Ishq

2009-07-03T00:49:00.000-07:00

Why watch:

Kareena's quintessential pout which she takes it to new levels in the movie. If you are a bebo fan, you can check out any of her magazine pics in which she is pouting.
Kareena's clothes and shoes. Some of them are fabulous. No, I am not gay and coming out of the closet now that Article 377 has been modified.
Akshay's stunts though they could have been handled a little better. Instead of giving them a comic theme they should have been made purely action oriented.
Akshay's regular comic acting. He is a good comic actor and has done a good job in this one too.
Exotic locales of Hollywood studios, Los Angeles and Italy. Free ride around the world sitting in a movie theatre.
The title song which is really nice. Hummable track and great music.
Lots of women in itsy bitsies giving the paisa vasool experience.

Why avoid:

Juvenile comedy sequences. Done to death scenes repeated in a million movies all across the world and fail to make you laugh.
Kareena's over the top acting. Bearable at times only.
Amrita Arora - why the heck is she in a movie. She took over the size zero crown from Bebo and looks emaciated. She has shown a lot of skin wearing lingerie and all along you'd wish that she covers up and spare you.
Aftab Shivdasani - same as above.
Denise Richards - What the heck is she doing in the movie. Does not up the glam quotient if they were trying to get that effect with her presence. She looks old and haggard.
Flimsy plot just like the itsy bitsies worn by many women in the movie. Actually no, the plot is flimsier.
Tried to achieve the Hollywood class of movie making but the plot and theme is only for the masses who like cat calls and wolf whistling.

Certain scenes are funny but the rest of the movie fails to make you laugh and you feel "kambakkth" for going to the theatre.

Overall: My suggestion is to watch it on DVD with the remote firmly gripped in your hand. You will save money on the tickets and on headache pills. You will also end up finishing a lot of pending work at home while watching the movie. Or, invest money in the dvd of Hangover. A much better movie.

Reduce waste, save the planet

2009-06-29T06:16:00.000-07:00

Standardize chargers across devices like phones, cd players, mp3 players etc and across the globe. This way one charger can be used across multiple devices thereby reducing the need to manufacture different charging devices. Currently, they are not compatible and thus result in a lot of waste being dumped harming the environment.
Standardize electricity requirements of devices so that they do not require different voltages, wattage's for running across the globe. Different countries have different requirements for same products. This results in manufacturing of converters which can be totally avoided if the requirements were standardized across the world. Will help reduce waste being dumped in the soil and increase the life of the planet.
Ban all electric bulbs and subsidize the manufacture of energy saving bulbs. Subsidy can be given in the form of tax breaks.

Dil ki dooriyan

2009-06-29T00:07:00.000-07:00

A saint asked his disciples, ? Why do people shout at each other when they are upset?'
Disciples thought for a while, one of them said, 'Because we lose our calm, we shout for that.'
'But, why shout when the other person is just next to you?' asked the saint. 'Isn't it possible to speak to him or her with a soft voice? Why do you shout at a person when you're angry?'
Disciples gave some other answers but none satisfied the saint.
Finally he explained, 'When two people are angry at each other, their hearts distance a lot. To cover that distance they must shout to be able to hear each other. The angrier they are, the stronger they will have to shout to hear each other through that great distance.'
Then the saint asked, 'What happens when two people love each other? They don't shout at each other but talk softly, why? Because their hearts are very close. The distance between them is very small.
The saint continued, 'When they love each other even more, what happens? They do not speak, only whisper and they get even closer to each other in their love. Finally they even need not whisper, they only look at each other and that's all. That is how close two people are when they love each other.'

Law on arresting a woman...

2009-06-22T01:10:00.000-07:00

An incident took place in Pune - a young girl was attacked by a man posing as a plain clothes officer; he asked her 2 come 2 the police station when she & her male friend didn't have a driver's license 2 show. He sent the boy off 2 get his license and asked the girl to accompany him to the police station. Took her instead to an isolated area where she was raped.

The law [which most of us are not aware of] clearly states that between 6 pm and 6 am (from sunset until sunrise), a woman has the right to REFUSE to go to the Police Station , even if an arrest warrant has been issued against her.

It is a procedural issue that a woman can be arrested between 6pm and 6am, if and ONLY if she is arrested by a woman officer & taken to an ALL WOMEN police station..And if she is arrested by a male officer, it has to be proven that a woman officer was on duty at the time of arrest.

Please be aware of this and circulate it widely.

2009-06-12T02:06:00.000-07:00

You are only as good as what you practice. But you can only practice what you learn.

Attacks on Indians

2009-06-10T04:08:00.000-07:00

Much is written about in print, covered in the media and discussed over coffee, lunch and dinners world over. So will not bore you dear readers on elaborating on the same. Racism has been prevalent since the time of Adam and Eve and across all countries and continents. But that does not mean we take it lying down.

If the Aussies are attacking Indians then Indians have every right to retaliate. Eye for an eye. So what we are immigrant to Australia or for that matter to Canada or England. We contribute to their economy, we work there, we study by paying exorbitant fees to schools / colleges and also end up paying taxes. That practically makes us citizens of these countries albeit without a formal citizenship document. Also, this is not a one way relationship that we are the needy ones to be in Australia or any other place and quite desperately that the racism attacks are justified. If we are needy, so are they. We need better education, they need more people to fund for the service so that they can keep their economy going. If this sounds like fair business transaction where both needy parties are interacting then the attacks are quite despicable. So is the Indian and Aussie govt stand. They are all talking but no one seems to be doing anything about it. It was heart warming to see the Indian govt asking the Indians to calm down and not retaliate when they are being hunted like animals. I say retaliate and in same measure so that people know we will not take this crap lying down and will not go down without a fight.

If Australia is so concerned about its own citizens and feels threatened by the incredible talent of Indians stop giving visas to them. Problem solved. No visas, no immigrant, no insecurity feeling in the local population. If they cannot live without the dollars from the immigrants then provide them adequate security. It is their moral duty and obligation.

Locking systems

2009-05-28T01:05:00.000-07:00

Lately I have gotten into the habit (read OCD) of checking the main door of the house to see if it is locked or not. Many a times I have come back after driving a couple of miles to see if the door is locked. This got me thinking. Brace yourselves reader as you are going to be graced by divine wisdom. How about having a security key similar to the centralized locking key systems found in cars for the house. Also, the house security key can be mapped to your phone so that at the press of a button the door will shut and lock. Build an sms based locking mechanism. If you have forgotten to lock, or like yours truly suffer from OCD, then send an sms to the system and it will automatically lock the door. No more driving all the way back to check or worse yet fretting over it all day causing unnecessary stress and heartburn.
Now many readers might tell me that I am already too late with the idea and there is already an existing system in place on the same logic. My question is how come no one is talking about it and where is that system.

Bird repeller

2009-05-27T01:32:00.001-07:00

Why don't airlines carry a ultrasonic or some sonic bird repeller which will constantly emit a sound which can only be heard by birds and will discourage them in coming near to a flying aircraft. At least this will eliminate one potential risk which can bring down a plane.

Elections 2009

2009-05-18T02:09:00.000-07:00

Boy, what a result. The 2009 Indian elections turned out better than the current season of IPL. What twists, turns and finally a surprise winner at the end. No one predicted Congress to have a thumping victory but they proved everyone wrong, and how. So much for these exit polls, surely they will be looking to make a hasty exit from the limelight now that all of their predictions have gone wrong. So much for these chaand taare waale babas (read astrologers and numerologists) who got it wrong and by a mile. A lot of positives came out of this election. Now, hope they deliver the goods. But for now, celebration. You have to "hand" it to Congress and by extension Sonia, Rahul and Manmohan.

2009-05-15T07:19:00.000-07:00

By all means marry; if you get a good wife, you'll become happy; if you get a bad one, you'll become a philosopher - Socrates

2009 Elections

2009-05-14T02:51:00.000-07:00

Rahul Gandhi has finally come of age is the new notion doing the rounds of the hallowed Lutyens, buzzing kailash nagar and the queens necklace. However, I feel that he has a long way to go. Policits is not for novices and Rahul is as novice as they can come. He needs to read from scripts for his speeches and go back to his old timers to know the history of each constituency. This is being pitted against the season charm of LK Advani or the rousing rhetoric of Narendra Modi. Fat chance I would say. However, UPA might have a minor advantage over NDA as NDA has been out of action for a long time now. Internal feuds, missing Vajpayee and the much needed money which Pramod Mahajan was supposed to have stashed away in some Swiss bank has taken their toll on the popularity of NDA. But if one had to hand over the country then it has to be the congress. They are stable, they have steered the country through a rough economic patch affecting the world and this experience will give them a better handle on managing the economy and thereby growth for the next five years. This also is a time for Rahul to take on a major portfolio and show his mettle as a leader and start preparing himself for the ultimate honor of leading the country.

2009-05-11T07:59:00.000-07:00

How is it that people who can talk 19 to a dozen develop writer's block?

Flu

2009-05-08T05:32:00.001-07:00

Is the Swine Flu really an epidemic? So far only 1,000 people have been infected and only a handful dead. Every human life is sacred and each life taken is a huge loss.
But in today's day and age when the world is so easily connected the spread of such a flu could have been rapid and resulted in an epidemic of mammoth proportions. Some estimates say that if the Spanish flu epidemic in early 1900s is taken as a criteria, the flu this time around can claim more than 150 million people. Now that is a pandemic. However, so far, touch wood, only around 1,000 have been reported infected when potentially millions could have been. So, is this really an epidemic or this is just being too safe than sorry. If this epidemic scare shuts down countries, aborts trade and exchange of goods, stops people movement on business, that would be a epidemic of mammoth proportion as this can result in potentially billions of dollars of economic impact. Theoretically, flu might not claim a lot of lives but the economic impact it can cause might make it a huge epidemic.

Eating a humble pie

2009-04-26T10:49:00.000-07:00

Roadies 6.0 winner is Nauman. Totally contradictory to my predictions about Palak winning the Roadies and becoming the first woman to win Roadies. Guess, MTV does truly believe in gender equality and let only the best man (read contestant) win. Literally.

No Nostradamus, am I?

New Afghani Law

2009-04-23T08:42:00.000-07:00

Husbands can refuse to feed their wives if they refuse to have sex with them.
In a sense if you don't "feed" a man, he has a right not to feed you.
Now try faking that headache.

Jokes aside I am amazed at abilities of the Afghani religious lawmakers to become regressive. Just when you think they have peaked out in regressiveness, they surprise you with a gem like above.

M

2009-04-22T03:41:00.000-07:00

M is the symbol for 1000 in Roman system. Finally, the hits on this blog has reached 1000 today. Mostly contributed by yours truly. But, want to THANK all of you who patiently read the posts and persevered in a hope to find an intelligently written piece (maybe some day) and in this hope kept returning to the blog and thereby contributing to the hits.

Roadies 6.0 - twist continues

2009-04-19T23:38:00.000-07:00

The twist in the finals was fantastic. Could not have imagined that they will bring in three ousted roadies to compete for a place for the grand finale. However, I still stand by my last point in the earlier post. This time they will want to make a woman win the competition and considering Palak is the only woman contestant she has a better chance than both Nauman and Kiri.
How do we find out who won - wait and let the events unfold.

Roadies 6.0

2009-04-17T06:23:00.000-07:00

My bets are on Palak to win Roadies 6.0. Why you might ask? Ask :-)

Too many coincidences to ignore.

Palak was one of the few who was selected to come back to Roadies after getting eliminated initially.
In the second last episode, the twist was very conveniently designed to keep Palak in the game when she was voted out.
Nauman had a change of heart in the last episode and he decided to take her to the final episode. Only god and love can bring about this change in a person and don't see signs of either here. How will he face Tamanna after this can become another reality show. MTV, hope you are reading this.
She is very entertaining, obnoxious but entertaining.
Little known fact - she featured in the movie Singh is Kingg in the song 'bhootani ke" as the bride. So she is already in Tinsel town and making her the winner will only give MTV more publicity.
Last but not the least, Roadies has not been won by any woman so far. This will give MTV an opportunity to set an example and make more in-roads in the women segment.

"Good Deed"

2009-04-16T19:17:00.001-07:00

The 'rapists' in the Andheri rape case of a TISS students are feeling cheated. They were surprised when the girl filed a case. After all, they played gentlemen to the hilt. First, they offered themselves in a sexual act. They didn't charge a dime for this so called service. They bought drinks and that too by truck loads. They even rolled up a joint and volunteered to teach a novice in the art of smoking. Last but not the least, after gang raping, they get a contraceptive pill to avoid any unwanted pregnancy. If this is not gentlemanly behaviour then what is.

As they say, no good deed should go unpunished. This shouldn't either. Jailing these guys will not be just. Castrating them after pouring hot wax on their testicles, yes, that would be fair.

2009-04-16T06:26:00.000-07:00

This is what all smokers and drinkers say.

Comic strip taken from Explosm site. They have some pretty cool comic strips there. URL is www.explosm.net

Shendi

2009-04-15T02:20:00.000-07:00

First credit card fraud, now car fraud. Looks like my planets and stars are in really favorable positions and alignment.

I was recently a victim of a car fraud, executed with Swiss precision. A con job worthy of a movie. I was returning home last night and at a signal one guy pointed out that there were sparks coming from the car. I thought to myself, rather modestly, that with me inside the car sparks are bound to fly. Modesty aside, i took that guy as a nut case and drove a little further when another 'gentleman' pointed that there were sparks coming out of the bonnet.

Now modesty was totally aside. I parked the car to the side of the road to look into the bonnet and this gentleman who pointed it out also tagged along to see. I did not suspect anything and was feeling nice and warm inside the heart by the gesture of this good Samaritan. I parked the car, opened the bonnet and started the car. This gentleman the said that sparks were coming out so i got out to see it for myself. Lo and behold, there were sparks the size of bonfire coming out of the ignition plug. He said that I am lucky and had I driven at a speed above 40km/h the sparks would have ignited the petrol which was going into the engine and engine and car would have exploded. Just like Hindi movies, in high air. He then went in search of a mechanic and the mechanic said that I need to change the ignition plug. But he called it Alternator and said that it will cost me 6K. However, I learnt today that the thing is called ignition plug and costs around 1.2K.

The mechanic said that he just closed his garage but will do this favor to me by checking what is wrong. He checked, asked me to change the part, volunteered to get the part from his shop, gave me his owner's cell number to find out the prize and the owner said that since the garage is closed, he will send me the warranty card by courier next day.

How did I find out the scam? I decided to get the warranty card myself and when I went to that garage, found that no one by the mechanic or the owner's name worked there. The garage specialises in two wheeler servicing and not four wheeler and the owner of the garage, a nice lady, chuckled and said I was a victim of a elaborate scam. She called it Shendi, which in Mumbai means someone made a fool of you.
I have the cell number of the guy (probably a prepaid), do you think it's worth filing a complaint?
Consolation - atleast the car didn't blow.

2009-04-09T01:01:00.000-07:00

Women have a much better time than men in this world. There are far more things forbidden to them - Oscar Wilde

Miss India

2009-04-08T06:49:00.000-07:00

Like the new femina miss India collection from d'damas ad which is being aired on TV these days. Hats off to the ad agency guys who came up with this brilliant ad which makes a total mockery of the miss India contest and contestants. I think the intent of the ad was to promote the jewellery line and miss India contest but ended up making a huge mockery of the whole show.
On a different note, totally impressed by Ekta Choudhary. Her answer to the final question was mind blowing. Shows a sharp and sensitive mind. She was impressive from the 'get go' even though she fumbled a bit. Was rooting for her as she came across with a lot of personality and glad to note that she won. Wish, I had put my money on her as well. Would have made a bundle.

Affordable housing – 20th floor slums

2009-04-06T06:55:00.001-07:00

India is moving towards affordable housing. Translation: developers will start building houses which will be in the sub 30 Lakhs per flat category. In smaller cities, typically tier II and III, this translates into, 1000-1300 sq ft, 2-3 BHK flats which are reasonably sized. However, in Tier I cities, specifically cities like Mumbai, Delhi, Bangalore and Hyderabad this will translate into a 600-800 sq ft flats in the 1-2 BHK category. I like delaying getting into the main topic, just like the developers who like delaying the project after taking money from customers. To make it affordable developers will start squeezing the space out of the flats without changing the per sq ft rate. Their profit is important than a living space for an individual so the sizes will become small. Living room will look like a small bedroom, room will shrink to the size of a small bathroom, and bathrooms will shrink to the size of bathrooms found in Indian trains. So now a person will own a house in a plush apartment complex in a nice suburb in Mumbai but the living space in the house will not be enough for a family of four. Each building will have more than 6-8 flats per floor to maximize floor space. The dividing walls between the flats will be reduced from 8 inches thickness to 4 inches. That’s why the title. If you have been to a chawl in Mumbai, you will easily understand. This is how people in chawls and slums live. They are totally cramped, in each other’s spaces and without any privacy. In case you haven’t seen a chawl, suggest watch Vaastav for better understanding. You might feel like killing yourself after watching the movie but atleast you will die a knowledgeable person.

Advantages:

No need for a TV as saas bahu episodes could be heard from each household. Thanks to the thin dividing walls.
People will be in each other’s spaces. Just like married couples and every one knows how happy married couples are. Sukh dukh ke saathi. This will promote community bonding and harmony.
Kaam waali bai will not have to search for multiple jobs in different locations. She will be able to work all day on one floor.
BMCs dream of restricting usage to 45 litres per person can be realized as smaller house will require less water.
Every person’s dream will be realized. Ek ghar ho sapno ka will not just be a catch phrase or a dream but will be a reality.
Population will come under control. Earlier it was hum do humaare do. With space constraint it will become hum do humaare ek or better yet, hum do humaare rehane do.

Credit Card Fraud

2009-04-03T03:19:00.000-07:00

You always hear about credit card frauds happening all over the world but never imagine that one day you might also become a victim. You will have one person in your group who will advice you against using the card online or using a credit card altogether due to such frauds. You would have brushed such fears as unwarranted and gone on using the card happily. I am one of those, who have always brushed away the thought of becoming a prey to credit card fraud, until today.

I am a proud contributor to the statistics about people whose credit card has been used fraudulently. Mine was online purchase of tickets for Delhi and god knows which other destinations. The perpetrator/s used the card to purchase flight tickets on two different airlines. In the second purchase they ( I am using plural as I believe there has to be more than one) cancelled the ticket immediately to get a credit note from the airline which can then be used at a later stage to book tickets.

Angry, irritated and indignant that something like this can still happen to you in this day and age of hi-tech security, enough fraud checks in place and more importantly the trust you place in your vendors to keep the sanctity of the credit card information. Extremely impressed with the ICICI credit card fraud detection department for promptly following up with me to confirm if I made the purchases or not and then taking appropriate action. This timely step will save the bank and yours truly a bundle as all the tickets have been cancelled and the credit note blocked.

Extremely pissed at the airlines that in-spite of repeated complaints, a case filed against them and won and many protests they continue to give a credit note to the customer in lieu of ticket cancellation than refund the money back to the customer. To avoid such frauds they have to start paying back the refund money to the customer. If this refund system was in place don't think anyone would have used the card online to buy flight tickets and then cancelled to get the credit note which can then be sold to some spurious travel agent who can use the note to make tickets for someone else. The criminals don't gain anything if they cancel the ticket as the money goes back to the cardholder. Not saying that this solution will put an end to frauds but will at-least result in one additional control in place to prevent frauds.
My entire family believes in 'cash is king' and I was the exception. I can see all of them now with the "listen to your family, told you so" expression.

2009-04-01T01:01:00.000-07:00

Jab bhi hum unka naam lete hain
apne dil se inteqam lete hain
apni barbadiyon ke fasane main
apne dosto ka naam lete hain
unki galiyon mein ab basera nahi
khud ko yehi paigam dete hain