Gambhir vs. Watson

The issue between Gautam Gambhir and Shane Watson has become quite 'gambhir'. Couldn't resist the bad pun. But, on a 'gambhir' note (there I go again), the discrimination against all players non-white still continues. Gautam was at fault for hitting Shane during his running between the wicket (watch news channels or read news papersfor more details, this blog is not times) but Shane did provoke Gautam verbally and to add fuel to the fire did not budge from his running line. So it was but obvious that Gautam run into him, albeit purposely. Well, if you are standing in the line of a running player be prepared to get nicked. However, ICC did not see it that way and penalized Gautam by bannning him for a test and levying a fine of 10% match fee on Shane. Now that is discrimination. Verbal assault is as painful as a physical assault and a provoker should also be held equally responsible. Ok, his punishment should have been a little less severe than Gautam but 10% fine is nothing, plain peanuts. He should have been fined 100% match fees. That would have been a warning to him and others that provoking will not be tolerated.
Kudos to Gautam for standing up to Shane. A double ton and a nick which cost only one match - totally worth it.

Walks

I like long walks, especially when they are taken by people who annoy me.

Papa Pancho

If you are a punjabi food lover, take a trip to Papa Pancho either at Versova or in Bandra. The restaurant chain is owned by Prahlad Kakkar, thus the name Papa Pancho. Yes, the word Pancho means exactly what you are thinking. Can you expect any less from Kakkar given his in your face sense of humor? The restaurant has a very dhaba style setting which makes you feel that you are sitting in a dhaba on a national highway. Food is typical punjabi fare and taste is above average. Try dal makhni and aloo jeera(what else can you expect from a couch potato). Entrees are served with rotis, raita, onions and curd in a thaali. Order a glass of masala chaas or lassi to go with the food. Best to go with a group of friends and let loose in punjabi or hindi, omkara style, and you will experience a true punjabi fun way of eating and having a good time. Not too expensive is an added plus.

Happy Diwali

Wishing all of you a very happy and prosperous Deepavali.

Aarghhhhhh

#%&* %$#* #$*# #$$* #&&* #@**

Bailout

"Investment analyst and entrepreneur Dr. Marc Faber concluded his monthly bulletin (June 2008) with the following:
'The federal government is sending each of us a $600 rebate. If we spend that money at Wal-Mart, the money goes to China. If we spend it on gasoline it goes to the Arabs. If we buy a computer it will go to India. If we purchase fruit and vegetables it will go to Mexico, Honduras and Guatemala. If we purchase a car it will go to Germany/Japan. If we purchase useless crap it will go to Taiwan and none of it will help the American economy. The only way to keep that money here at home is to spend it on prostitutes and beer, since these are the only products still produced in US. I've been doing my part."

Mantyhose

I thought fashion will evolve from skirts to maybe saris or sarongs for men but as they say 'you are limited by your own imagination'. The new stuff out in the markets for men is a thing called mantyhose. In lay man terms - it's a pantyhose for men, thus the name mantyhose.
Going by the same logic, shouldn't 'pantyhose' be for a pan. Couldn't resist this lame PJ.
Fashion is truly converging. Earlier, women had skirts, saris, long and short dresses, pantyhoses, garter belts, stockings etc and men had suits, pants /shirts and shorts. Then, female fashion invaded male domain with evolution of pants, shirts, shorts etc for women. They even usurped business suits which were a very male thing. Well, now it's the turn of male fashion to move in on female territory. Skirts, manbras, manscars and mantyhose and this is just the beginning.
The world is slowly moving towards becoming unisex. There might come a time when malls will not have separate aisles for men and women clothes. They will all be in the same section. Don't raise your eyebrow, did you imagine mantyhose 10 years ago. Impossible is nothing.

Bright side - Now, couples can wear each other's clothes without being called kinky.

Wish

Oh Lord - give me patience - NOW!!

Jet is flying the good times

Jet and Kingfisher have finally decided to be 'friends' to tide over the downturn in the economy. As they say, in business, film industry and politics, there are no permanent enemies or friends. Not so long ago, Mallya implicated Goyal, not so overtly, of using his political nexus to thwart Kingfisher's launch and expansion plans. Now, they have joined hands in a purely 'platonic' way.

Welcome to the new cartel of Indian airline companies. First, Kingfisher bought the low cost carrier Deccan and slowly started increasing fares thereby putting a spanner in the growth of low cost sector. This gave other low cost airlines good opening to increase their fares. Now this 'friendship'.

Inspite of crude prices falling from their high of $150+ to $80 today, the prices of air travel which was increased due to hike in crude has not decreased. With this 'friendship' one can only assume that it will either stay there or go up. I hope the MRTP guys are not sleeping and will look into this 'friendship' more closely to ensure that monopoly is not created as these two now will own about 60% of the market.

The current news is that they have invited Indian to join hands with them. Trust Mallya to go for a 'threesome'. He is not known as the king of good times for nothing.

Customers get ready to get 'screwed', again and again and again......

Sensex - smile

I hope the guy in the pic below and million others would be smiling today. With this upside rally, I pray that some of them who are stuck with capital erosion are able to make some profits or atleast recover their capital and exit.

There are certain things which you should never 'try' to time or outguess:

1. Markets
2. Nature
3. Women

In all of above, the chances of looking like the guy below are pretty high.

Sensex - pic is worth a thousand words

Nothing can explain the gloom due to sensex better than this picture.

Great pic from Rediff.

End of Capitalism

Lehman's bankruptcy.
Merrill's takeover.
Goldman's and Morgan's conversion from investment banks to commercial banks.
Bail out of AIG, Freddie, Fannie and Bear Stearns.
Relief package for troubled loans.
Takeover of top three Icelandic banks by its government.
Ban on short selling.

Is this the end of Capitalism (greed, greed and more greed)?
Is this the beginning of 'Socialist Capitalism'?
Does it mean India's philosophy of socialism in capitalism was right all along?

Smoking Ban - more

In addition to non smokers, there are of sections of society which are thankful for the ban.

• Chai wala /Chewing gum wala
  
• Rehab Clinics
  
• Better halves/Partners - Now they don't have to put up with the nicotine breath in the name of love.
  

Sometimes, the government does good things.

Sensex

What sensex needs right now is a 'viagra'. This is a classic case of not keeping fit as youth leads to requirement of artificial boosters in later stage. Only if sensex was trim, fit and not bloated in Jan this year it wouldn't have seen this meltdown needing a CRR cut, the viagra i mentioned earlier, to keep it 'UP'.

But like Viagra, it will only prop up for a short time. What next?

Warning: Regular doses of viagra might cause dangerous side effects.

Performance Appraisals

It is that time of the year. Season of year end performance appraisals. I came across a few gems which really drive the point home.

• I work for money. If you want loyalty, get a dog.
• As long as my boss keeps pretending that I am earning a lot, I go on pretending that I work a lot.

Will add more as and when I come across. Feel free to use these in your discussions.

It's a dog's life

I came across a website, link below, which sells doggie clothes. That is common you'd say. But this company is not just selling clothes, but also bikinis. Yeah, you read it right, the company is selling bikinis for dogs.
http://www.dogclothes-apparel.com/sites/Sportswear/Bikini.html

How do they make bikinis for dogs. What do you ask when you go to buy? Can I get a size 36B or is it BB. What do you do for reference? In a lingerie store you can look at some woman (like men need an excuse), point and say that size is what I am looking for. Hell, you can look at the salesgirl and say that. But how do you do that for dogs.

This is not the all important serious life changing stuff this post is all about. This is about the expression "It's a dog's life".
The expression means the person's life is miserable. It sucks. For trivia buffs, this expression was first recorded in 16th century.

Let's look at a dog's life:

• They can pee/poop where ever they want and not worry about cleaning.
• They don't have to worry about whether the toilet seat is up or down.
• They can lick their wounds and move on.
• They are carried by women in arms and are in constant contact with their boobs (if you need a substitute - woof woof).
• They get to lick women all the time and not get screamed at or asked to use listerine.
• Women never fake headaches with dogs.
• They get to do the doggy style..always....

I think it's time that we redefine the meaning of "It's a dog's life". It should no longer be used by people whose life suck. It should denote happiness and imply that life rocks.

Credit Crunch

What worries me most about the credit crunch is that if a bank returns my cheque with a remark 'insufficient funds', I'll not know if they are referring to mine or theirs.

What men want?

I know what men want. Men want to be really, really close to someone who will leave them alone.

Directions

It is a well-documented fact that guys will not ask for directions. This is a biological thing. This is why it takes several million sperm cells, each one wriggling in its own direction, totally confident it knows where it is going, to locate a female egg despite the fact that the egg is, relative to them, the size of Wisconsin. - Dave Barry

Spread your wings

Concrete "Jungle"

Golden Horizon

At times don't we all feel like spreading our wings and flying to that golden horizon.

Smoking Ban

One thing Ramadoss and the government finally got it right. The ban on smoking in public places. I can see all smokers up in arms hoping this post will go up in smoke.

India's population is 1200 million and there are approx 120 million smokers, according to latest census, which translates into a “whopping” 10% smoker population. All smokers are indignant that government is curbing their freedom. Questions like if smoking is injurious to health why doesn't the government ban manufacturing of cigarettes instead of banning smoking in public places. If I were to draw a parallel, this would be similar to laws on speeding. When cars are made to go over 200 kms/hour why are there laws which makes speeding over 60 illegal? Why not just ban the cars or pass laws which will ensure that cars with speed capacity of over 60 are not manufactured?

Banning cars or banning manufacturing of cigarettes will be infringement on freedom. It would mean a ban on making a choice. However, banning smoking in public place is upholding the rights of 90% people to inhale tobacco free air. This is such a fundamental right which smokers violate with impunity regardless of whether it causes air pollution, allergic reactions or plain irritation to others.

I say smokers should rejoice that manufacturing cigarettes is not banned. They are free to buy cigarettes and kill themselves. After all, every one has a right to screw their own lives.

Thank God the smoking ban is finally in place. Now, your smoking will not kill me.